"It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are." - E.E. Cummings
When thinking about love, people often assume that they have to learn how to master it when they're already in a relationship. In reality, who you are before you ever fall in love says much more about how your relationship will work out. You might be surprised to learn that most of the work of creating true love in your life is actually done before you ever meet “the one.” It comes from learning about yourself and who you really are. So you're thinking, how can I learn to know myself, so that I find true love? Read on.
Finding the right person doesn’t necessarily mean we’re ready, willing and able to love. If we look outside of ourselves for fulfillment and expect somebody else to be able to fill the void, we will never truly find it. When we find it within ourselves, it will provide us with the foundation we need in order to realize our full potential and become the best person we can. The person who we want to share with others.
The first step is to get to know yourself in a deeper sense. This is more than just your basic identity, such as your name, sex, age, occupation and hobbies. You must become familiar with who you are as a person and what you are feeling. How often are you really stopping and paying attention to your own feelings? One way to get to know yourself better is to spend quality time with yourself. Drop everything that you're doing and spend a few minutes with yourself. This concept is known as self-observation. By spending a few quiet moments with yourself, you can begin to assess your behaviors, your thought process, and determine the endless possibilities of your personal growth. This will lead to a better understanding of yourself and allow you to perform better self-care. You'll most likely also come to realize that you really quite like yourself, and that you are, in fact, pretty awesome.
Once you start to get to know yourself at a deeper level, you'll inevitably begin to value yourself more - and this is an important factor in finding true love. We need to fundamentally shift our way of thinking to value ourselves rather than whether or not someone is in our life. We need to understand that true happiness comes from within, and only then will we be fully suited to have a healthy relationship with another (fulfilled) person.
As you make this shift, you won't focus on finding a partner. Instead, your focus will be on building a great relationship with yourself. You'll replace anxiety with faith. You'll remember to trust in divine timing - people will come into your life at the exact time you need them to and/or are ready for them. Finally, you'll learn to receive the love that is offered to you. Receiving love is one of the most vulnerable things we can do as it is an act of showing yourself completely to another person, but it is also the most rewarding.